The father of the bride makes the first speech

In some ways the father of the bride has the hardest time of all when making his speech – it is usually a very emotional time for him and he is talking about someone who is very special to him.

It’s also the first speech at a wedding, and this in itself can make it more stressful than for any of the other speakers. However, knowing what to say and preparing in advance can make it a much easier experience…

Thank the guests

The bride’s father should start his speech by thanking everyone for attending. He can also thank the people working at the function (caterers, photographers etc.).

Talk about the bride

A larger part of his speech should be about his daughter, saying how proud he is of her, how wonderful she was as a child, and fulfilling it was to raise her. He can also mention something that happened as a child – this can simply be one of those moments when children say something perfectly innocently which turns out to be very funny.

Welcome the groom into the family

The father of the bride should then turn his attention to the groom and welcome him as a member of his family and say a few words about his achievements. He may wish to give a few tips on how to have a happy married life – giving examples of how they helped him. Finally he should propose a toast to the couple wishing them a happy married life.

The father of the bride’s speech can contain some humour, as it helps to keep guests interested.

And that’s’ all there is to it!

• Father of the bride (Introduced by the Best man)
• The bridegroom
• The best man

It is quite common for other guests to say something, usually close relatives of the bride and groom. These should be after the main speeches and be kept reasonable short.

Each of the specific speakers should include the following in their speech:

• Father of the bride:
  • Toasts the bride and groom
  • Welcomes the guests
  • Speaks about his daughter
• Bridegroom (speaking on behalf of himself and his bride):
  • Responds to Father of the bride speech
  • Thanks his parents
  • Proposes a toast to the bridesmaid
• Best man
  • Responds to the Bridegroom’s speech
  • Traditionally the longest speech
  • Should be interesting an entertaining

Be careful with your content!

One other important rule, mentioned elsewhere on this site but worth repeating, is that you should not say anything which is in anyway likely to embarrass or upset anyone else at the wedding, or which most of them won’t be able to relate to – this includes talking about stags/hen nights, racist remarks or facts about people which only close friends should know. If you’re not sure because you don’t know everyone who will be attending then ask!

Don't forget the toast!

It can be a nerve-racking day for the groom even without having to make a speech! But the good news is that you only really have to say a few words of thanks – keep it simple and you’ll fly through!

Welcome the guests

The groom should begin with welcoming all the guests.  He should specifically mention the guests who have travelled a long way simply to be a part of the ceremony. The groom should also extend his appreciation to the parents of the bride. He should also say how fortunate he is to get the opportunity to be a part of their family and thank them to allow him to marry their daughter.

Mention the bride

The next part of the groom speech is focused on the bride, indicating how thankful he is that the bride accepted his proposal.  The groom will usually says something about their relationship and share some facts like where or how they first get to meet each other, perhaps sharing a humorous story related to both of them. It won’t do any harm if you can inject some humour in your groom’s wedding speech.

Thank the groomsmen and bridesmaids

The groom should thank the groomsmen, especially the best man, who have accompanied and helped him. Last, but not the least, are the bridesmaids:- the groom thanks the bridesmaids for being a part of the ceremony and helping the bride. He may even propose a toast to the bridesmaids.

The groom finishes up his speech by introducing the best man as the next speaker.

And that’s all there is to the groom’s speech…

This a an excellent way to relax your guests and make them receptive to what you’re going to say. Don’t make personal remarks about the bride and/or groom. The purpose of your speech is to honour the bride and groom – you need to choose your jokes very carefully if they are the subject of the joke!

It’s much better to us a little self-deprecating humour. Mention that you’re nervous and make that work for you.Tell them why you are there. Let your listeners in on your relationship to the bride and groom:-  they may not all know you, and tell them why you’re giving a speech.

Tell a Story

Tell the audience a story that’s meaningful to you, and that illustrates some quality that you admire about the bride or groom, or both. For example, John and I started playing golf together during college. He was always better than me; in fact, he started competing in tournaments. But he still plays with me, and sometimes he even lets me beat him.

Wish Them Happiness

Express your wishes for the couple’s happiness. You can use a short quotation here, if you like. Thank your audience. That’s it! You’ve written a great wedding speech.

Sometimes the bride will say a few words

Once upon a time only the Best Man made a speech at a many weddings. These days it’s common to have a speech not only from the best man, but also the maid of honour, the bride’s father and the groom. Many people have a fear of public speaking, but with a little thought and preparation it can be relatively painless. Here are seven simple tips to help you prepare for that perfect wedding speech.

1. Write down your speech and break it into an opening, middle and closing section. This will help you organise everything you want to say in a coherent and logical manner.

2. If you are not sure of what you should include in your speech think about buying some ready made wedding speeches, or look at websites which specialise in speeches. Invest in a good one that will guide you through what you need to say in your speech.

3. Use humour to keep your speech interesting and light. The only way to ensure that you have the guests attention is to keep them laughing and asking for more – but don’t make the speech a continous joke, make sure you stick to a theme that most of the guests will be able to relate to.

4. Stories that you include in your speech should about people or subjects that most of the guests know. Keep the story short and preferably about the bride or groom. Also, skip any racy stories from your speech that might cause potential embarrassment to anyone in the wedding party. Mention of ex-girlfriends and boyfriends is a strict no-no.

5. Practice the speech, out loud…. The best speakers are those who practice what they have to say. They may look like they’ve been giving wedding speeches all their lives, but the fact remains that to look spontaneous, fluent and a great orator you have to put in some effort. You can practise in private – say your speech out loud – it’s surprising how difficult even this can be if you’ve not made speeches or spoken in public before. If you can say he speech out loud to yourself it will become MUCH easier to do so to a larger audience. It also will help you to decide if it is ready or needs amendments.

6. Don’t make the speech too long – as we stated above, there will be several people making speeches, so you are not under pressure to keep the guests entertained for long!

7. Don’t forget to end the speech with a  toast to the bride and groom – add a note to do this at the end of your speech.

Use these tips to ensure that your Wedding Speech brings a smile to everyone’s face and maybe a tear to some eyes (and not yours!)!

Humour is a great ice-breaker

A good wedding speech with some humour is a great ice-breaker, and it’s a great feeling if you can get your audience laughing. However, bear in mind that you don’t have to keep the guests in fits of laughter for half an hour – that’s for films… So, here are three simple steps to get you started…

1) This probably the most important rule of all :- Make sure to take your audience into account when forming jokes to work into your speech. There will almost always be people of all ages and beliefs at a wedding – and not everyone has the same type of senses of humour (how often have you told a joke to one person who has laughed hysterically, and the next person you’ve told it too didn’t raise a grin?). Whoever you are at the wedding, a bad joke is an embarrassment, and one which offends is a show-stopper. While it may not be possible to please everyone, do your best to form jokes that you think everyone can get or relate to.

2) Your jokes should tie into a central message – your jokes should be an integral part of the speech, which shouldn’t be all about jokes, but your jokes should be all about your speech. This simply means that your speech should have a central message or purpose, and your jokes should compliment this. Having a theme (such as changes in the bride and groom, old memories that influenced your life, or even how you will setup a new life with your spouse) will help you move your speech along.

3) Give your speech a flow that enforces your central message in the beginning, middle and end. Constant reminders of what you want to get across are a surefire way of making sure people walk away with that message.