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What are the rules?

What are the rules for giving speeches? Well there are no hard and fast rules – at the end of the day it’s your wedding and you can organise it as your please!. However, there is some etiquette to follow if you want to please as many people as possible. The order of speeches is quite important, as each speech has specific requirements ( e.g. the bridegroom may toast the bridesmaids and the best man may respond on their behalf) are as follows:

• Father of the bride (Introduced by the Best man)
• The bridegroom
• The best man

It is quite common for other guests to say something, usually close relatives of the bride and groom. These should be after the main speeches and be kept reasonable short.

Each of the specific speakers should include the following in their speech:

• Father of the bride:
  • Toasts the bride and groom
  • Welcomes the guests
  • Speaks about his daughter
• Bridegroom (speaking on behalf of himself and his bride):
  • Responds to Father of the bride speech
  • Thanks his parents
  • Proposes a toast to the bridesmaid
• Best man
  • Responds to the Bridegroom’s speech
  • Traditionally the longest speech
  • Should be interesting an entertaining

Be careful with your content!

One other important rule, mentioned elsewhere on this site but worth repeating, is that you should not say anything which is in anyway likely to embarrass or upset anyone else at the wedding, or which most of them won’t be able to relate to – this includes talking about stags/hen nights, racist remarks or facts about people which only close friends should know. If you’re not sure because you don’t know everyone who will be attending then ask!

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